family-friendly folks at Planned Parenthood were concerned that their
pro-abortion supporters may feel uncomfortable at the Thanksgiving
dinner table this year. You know — when you are surrounded by family and
the grizzly topic of tearing the unborn children limb from limb comes
up between ‘pass the potatoes’ and ‘great cranberry sauce, Aunt Edna.’
Which never seems to actually happen in real life.
Apparently PP’s staff were so worried, that they shared a few gems of ‘tolerance’ and wisdom via Tumblr.
dinner companions may say hurtful, offensive things about race, gender
identity, sexual harassment and assault, birth control coverage and
abortion, or any number of topics, which can feel stressful, isolating
or enraging,” PP observes, pointing out how horrible your (likely
conservative) relatives could be.
“Abortion” is the last of the
possibilities cited before ‘…any number of other topics.’ It is however,
the primary focus of the rest of the piece.
For most of us, it is
highly unlikely that we’d sit down to a holiday dinner with family
members who are rabid with racist commentary, or totally pro-sexual
harassment/assault. But, by using these repulsive positions to lead the
list of “offensive” beliefs family members may be harboring, the
abortion provider casually lumps being pro-life into what it hopes is
the same despicable kettle.
“Visiting family…can be challenging,”
Planned Parenthood continues. To deal with your family when “things get
hard,” they recommend the following:
decisions about what to do around Thanksgiving so you feel safe,
whether that means not going home at all, going home with a friend or
partner at your side, or only visiting for dinner,” they said, implying
that your family is unloving, menacing and unsafe to be around.
Build Allyship with Family Members Who Respect you
more people in your family who can call people out (or even better,
call people in) on their problematic behavior, the less acceptable it
So, if anyone disagrees with your position on a
subject, they are problematic and therefore unacceptable. Also, team up
and confront grandma over pie.
Engage people in conversation:
you feel safe doing so, start with a mutual value…For example, if
someone says they don’t think businesses should have to cover birth
control, ask them why, from a place of curiosity. Maybe they think
business owners are people who should be free to make decisions based on
their religion. You can agree that people should be free to make
decisions based on their beliefs- whether you’re a CEO or employee; you
should have the ability to make your own personal healthcare decisions.
So you explain (calmly) how that mutual value informs your stance.
Practice asking questions, finding value in their sentiment that you can
agree on and start from there. This is hard work, but you only get
better at it if you keep trying.”
Business owners are people. They
may believe, as many non-business owners also do, that the person who
should be financially responsible for your reproductive activities and
protection- is you. In fact, many people believe no one should ever be
forced to provide funds used to abort a child. The problem occurs when
you shirk your responsibilities and think your employer or your fellow
citizens should pay for whatever you want, whenever you want them to.
Take A Stand:
totally ok to tell someone that their language or behavior is hurtful
and unacceptable to you,” PP continues. “Tell them about the impact it
has on you and why, and what consequences of their actions are to the
larger community. Tell them you expect better, and what the consequences
are if they don’t change (like cutting off contact with them or
leaving)….You’re allowed to end the conversation, leave the room and set
whatever boundaries you need to feel safe.”
In other words, if
these people do not agree with your opinion or beliefs, they are wrong —
and apparently evil too. In telling your family members you ‘expect
better of them’, you are raising yourself up as the judgmental and final
authority on all things abortion. And you are threatening to punish
them for not agreeing with you.
This is the Planned Parenthood Playbook: manipulating, undermining and destroying families, one act at a time.
~ Conservative Zone